14.12.11

MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU SAD SACKS OF CRAP

since robert frost is my favorite poet i wrote a winter poem that is inspirational. i hope you are inspired to do something great this holiday season.










i went to the woods to die
to splay belly-out in a red copse
with no internet.

i sawed down two conifers
and built a coniferous fixed gear bike
with tires from snakes.

i practiced track stands on my fixed gear bike
i bombed down the forest hills
while i waited to die.



i had no boyfriend.



i wrote boy's names on the husks
of leaves and stuffed the leaves
in my underpants.



when winter came i flogged
my legs with naked sticks
to put the warmth in.

ice boxed my throat rigid
my eyelids swelled up and white light erupted
from the roof of my mouth.



i suffered
an uncomplicated episode of diarrhea.



i screamed into a mulchy pit of dead deer
what the fuck i screamed
what the fuck.



i imagined an issue of People magazine
featuring only myself
myself is the only People:

i have the best bikini body
i am the sexiest man alive
what else.



one day the snow fell into the tunnel
i used for my snacks
and i lost the way up.

i lost the way up for days until peter
from peter paul and mary
was skiing up there.

peter pull me out
peter help me i'm down here somewhere
there are no snacks left.

but it was too late
i was dead
werner herzog made a film about it. 

4 comments:

Tyler David Sherman said...

This is very interesting. And complicated. I feel like there is more to unpack.

I like that when light erupts from the roof of one's mouth it's shining down.

kristin hayter said...

Thanks tyler, i find that lately i'm really fond of funny/sad and good/stupid, as well as defeat. the tropes of poetry and art in general are kind of lost to me at this point, and i think ceasing to participate is a large part of what this dumb thing is about.

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